A New Adventure (Part II, the anti-climax)

Well today I got up at 5:30AM to take my adventure to China. I bought a $60 one way ticket to Jinmen/Kinmen island (an island controlled by Taiwan but within sight of Mainland China and one of the few places you can travel direct from Taiwanese territory to China) and got in at 8:00AM (by the way Taiwanese domestic flights necessitate you getting to the airport a whole 30min early) then hauled ass in a taxi to get to the ferry terminal for the 8:30AM ferry to Xiamen, China to get that visa extension (see the picture above).

Side note: I have included some pictures of Jinmen since it was really pretty and not as built up as Taiwan. That's mainly due to the fact htat China shelled the hell out of the island for years so not many people wanted to live there. The downside is most pictures are from an old-style village and don't show the rest of the island.

I got to the terminal in time and was juggling a phone call from my boss, since his father-in-law owns the ferry company so I had to go talk to some lady about the ticket. So I find the lady, Xiao Lan, and she says that the 8:30AM is cancelled since due to the very high winds and waves from a typhoon south of Taiwan and I would just have to wait for the next one. Then she calls me back to say all of the ferries are cancelled. Oh. Shit. I am at the end of my visa limit and if I don’t make it to China today I get a fine and a fucking record that may not allow me back into Taiwan.

Then for some reason I calmed down, I had stressed out a lot yesterday so I decided to go with the flow, which was the only thing I could do. My boss had his wife and her brother come to pick see me at the terminal to see what could be done. Now remember, I was there since I could not get a visa extension in Taipei, even for a multiple entry extendable visa.

Well we go up and talk to the immigration people to make sure that when I catch the ferry out the next day after the wind passes and that I don’t get fucked for being stuck there when everything was cancelled (basically to get a pass that says it’s ok I’m there for 61 days). However, within 15 minutes, a booked ferry order, and a form filled out the immigration people handed me a visa extension (the very one that Taipei could not handle)!

Apparently this is the little secret of Taiwanese immigration. As long as you show that you are planning to leave at a port of exit (seriously, wtf Taipei is the largest port of exit in Taiwan) and book a ticket out you can get an extension. That meant no more trip to China, which is good since that means I don’t have to waste my visa on a trip of only a few hours and now I can use it for a real trip.

Then I went out with my boss’s wife and her brother for some rice soup (it was only 10AM or so) and managed to spill some of this (good) shit on my hand and burned the hell out of myself. I’m ok now but I felt like an idiot. Then an hour later I had another meal at my boss’s in-law’s place, it was Chinese food made by a Filipino maid. That was the second time today I had talked to a person who never spoke with a white person who could speak Chinese (the first being the immigration lady). I then had a little time to tour the island before I jumped on a flight to Taipei.

And of course when I got into Taipei my boss had me go back into the office, which figured since as soon as something good happened today then something bad would follow.

A New Adventure (Part I)

So for those of you who do not know I am actually working here in Taiwan in a not-so-legal state. You see I have a tourist visa, which technically does not allow me to work but since I am paid under the table it’s not really a problem.

My visa is a multiple-entry tourist visa for 60 days that is extendable to 180 days. Seeing that I am at the 60 day limit I figured I would go to immigration, fill out a few forms, hand over the passport, come back the next day, and miss a few hours of work as a bonus.

The first warning was when the extension forms said I needed some government authorized form to fill out. No big deal I thought, I made a few calls (including one to a cop I know here). Then the shit hit the fan. When talking with the immigration agency they asked why I was here in Taiwan (tourism I said). Well it turns out (I shit you not that I am not making this up) the only way you can extend a tourist visa is if you are a rock star or you have blood relatives here in Taiwan. I am none of the above.

That meant I had to get the hell out of this place since tomorrow is my 60 day limit (even though the fine for up to 10 days over is only NT 2000—this is about $60). Well I made some calls to my boss and we decided that I can go to Xiamen, China I have a visa for China and it is easy to enter through Xiamen then stay with my boss until Saturday at his place. The initial plan was for me to leave tomorrow morning by taking a flight from Taipei to Jinmen island then a ferry to Xiamen.

The problem here is that I am also very urgently needed in the office since I speak English and we are trying to work out some new specs for our largest customer and there is a 1.5 million piece order going out Monday. So that means if I left I was going to screw my coworkers hardcore then absolutely have to work my but off when I came back.

So in a terrible twist of fate I agreed to cut my visit to a foreign country short. I will go to Xiamen via Jinmen tomorrow, take some pictures from the ferry terminal, and then turn around and come straight back to Taiwan. Sort of a waste of a single entry Chinese visa if you ask me.

BBQ, Beer, and a Babe

Just a rule, putting me around small children is usually not a good idea. Mainly since my maturity level is only rarely discernibly higher than that of a small child. So I was a little worried last night when I went to a bbq with two language partners at their friend’s house and they brought along a 18 month old.

First, let me say a Chinese/Taiwanese bbq is different than an American one. It is a little thing on the ground with some open coals that you use to grill small bite-sized pieces of all sorts of meat, seafood, and veggies whereas an American bbq usually has just one or two types of food that are grilled.

The thing was the whole event took place outside in an area that had NO breeze. Well within no time at all it was very hot, especially sitting next to a grill. So in addition to sweating a lot, my Taiwanese hosts figured they should give the white dude some beers. Now this is never a bad thing but the fact that I had not eaten much yesterday and I was sweating hard made me feel those beers much more than I would have liked.

Of course when I finished those they announced a beer run to 7-11. That was when I knew it…I had found a home!

Well the night was fun and I got to play around with an 18 month old who thought the white dude was pretty interesting. Overall, despite the sweating, it was a great night (come on bbq, beer, and good company is something I will only turn down if I die).

Karma is a crazy thing

So I'm still not over my little ride.

It started innocently enough. I was out tonight to a cool bar with my coworker and her friend. While there I taught them fun English words like "douchebag" and they taught me the Taiwanese equivalents. Just a note hearing a person who cannot speak English try to string together a bunch of f-bombs and such is one of the funniest things on the planet.

Then it was time to go and this is where karma came back to bite me in the ass, big time. I was to hitch a ride back to my place on my co worker's moped/mini-motorcycle. Not a bad deal, I get to ride right behind a decently attractive girl and get home for free.

Then reality set in. In the back, there were only some crappy handles and no real footrests. On these little devils you feel all of the bumps in the road and being on the back always feel like you are about to fall off. It was without a doubt one of the scariest times of my life to be barreling down streets at night when I couldn't see around the driver's head to see what was coming and there was very little to hold onto. All I wanted to do was get off of that thing so karma couldn't come all the way around (i.e. the only thing worse than being on the thing would be falling off of it then being rolled over by the car behind you). On top of that, my coworker thought this was the funniest thing in the world. Nothing like fearing for your life while your driver can't stop laughing.

I'm never doing that again, unless of course...

Haircut

So last night I went for my first haircut since I arrived in Taiwan. Needless to say I was getting a little shaggy and having such a high-brow office job that just doesn't work. About a month ago an American, who speaks no Chinese, on the floor below me told me how tough finding a good place to get a cut was and since the Taiwanese aren't used to Western hair they tend to mess up on the haircuts.

Well I speak enough Chinese to make it mildly clear what I want (short on the sides and slightly longer on the top). However, the simplicity confused the stylist since when everyone has straight black hair everyone wants a cool haircut to stand-out. When I said I wanted short on the sides and long on the top he figured I wanted my bangs cut and my sides cut and then leaving the rest in a mullet was perfectly fine (and it would be if not for my job). After some explaining I was able to come out just fine and I was only set back $4.50.

But since I came in late the guy had to stay over a bit. The thing was that he was cool with it since it was a chance to cut a foreigner's hair. Then the owner of the place came over and wanted just to touch my hair. For me it was really funny since both of them were totally shocked that I have no ladyfriend; I still haven't figured out what that is such a big deal.

The Sun

It sure is good to see the sun again. It has been about 4 days since I last saw it and much of that time was taken up by pouring rain. Now rain is nothing for me, I'm from Oregon, but this stuff during the typhoon was unreal. There would be a light to heavy rain for 10 minutes then an all-out open the flood-gates deluge for 45 minutes then the cycle would repeat (for 3 full days). Beyond that there was a small leak around my AC that went from small to somehow letting a mini-waterfall into my place. But in the end it turned out ok, my landlord--who is an awesome dude--came over last night and fixed that up with a load of caulking.

What's In a Name?

Apparently not much. So over the last 24 hours I found three really funny pronunciations of my name. First, someone at work thought I was named "clean" and figured this worked well because my desk is always clean. Second, another person thought I was named "client." No comment there. Finally, and most forgivable of all someone thought I was named Clinton.